Featuring highlights from The Onion's award-winning news coverage.
The Onion 2020 Daily Calendar: 2020 Daily Calendar, Funny Calendar, 2020 Calendar Book
The classic daily calendar featuring highlights from The Onion's award- winning news coverage. Popular calendar title! .
Cartoons from The New Yorker 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar
A roster of extraordinary artists continues to create indelible images that vary in style and tone, provocative, serene, whether whimsical, or laugh-out-loud funny. Each page of the cartoons from the new Yorker 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar features a witty cartoon from The New Yorker. Popular calendar title!
The cartoons of the New Yorker have entertained the magazine's readers for nearly a century. The calendar also features a plastic easel backer for easy tabletop display.
The Trump Leaks: The Onion Exposes the Top Secret Memos, Emails, and Doodles That Could Take Down a President
The onion, the nation's sole beacon of truth in an era besieged by darkness and lies, has fearlessly published hundreds of classified documents obtained from an anonymous whistleblower deep within the Trump White House. With this soon-to-be pulitzer-winning work of investigative reportage, America's Finest News Source has selflessly provided the world with its first and only glimpse inside the hidden workings and tortured minds of the Trump Administration.
Popular calendar title! From top secret national security briefings hand-colored in crayon by president Trump, to encrypted e-mails sent by Kremlin operatives, to Vice President Pence's impure thoughts about the Morton Salt girl, the earth-shattering revelations contained within The Trump Leaks are all but certain to topple the president and alter the very arc of global history.
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The Onion Book of Known Knowledge: A Definitive Encyclopaedia Of Existing Information
Popular calendar title! Are you a witless cretin with no reason to live? would you like to know more about every piece of knowledge ever? Do you have cash? Then congratulations, because just in time for the death of the print industry as we know it comes the final book ever published, and the only one you will ever need: The Onion's compendium of all things known.
Replete with an astonishing assemblage of facts, blood, and additional fees to edify even the most simple-minded book-buyer, threats, maps, charts, illustrations, THE ONION BOOK OF KNOWN KNOWLEDGE is packed with valuable information-such as the life stages of an Aunt; places to kill one's self in Utica, New York; and the dimensions of a female bucket, or "pail.
With hundreds of entries for all 27 letters of the alphabet, THE ONION BOOK OF KNOWN KNOWLEDGE must be purchased immediately to avoid the sting of eternal ignorance.
Awkward Family Photos 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar
Looking for the best collection of the most hilarious, absurd, and uncomfortable family photos ever captured on film? Then look no further than the Awkward Family Photos 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar. Based on the hugely popular AwkwardFamilyPhotos. Com and best-selling books of the same name, this full-color calendar is filled with cringeworthy photos—such as families in bizarre poses and matching outfits, siblings with outrageous hairstyles, gasp, and kids surrounded by props that defy logic—guaranteed to make you laugh, and recoil all at the same time.
The calendar also features a plastic easel backer for easy tabletop display. Popular calendar title! As an added bonus, the back of each page includes Daily Extra content such as puzzles, lists, jokes, activities, quotes, tips, and trivia.
The Daily Bitch 2019 Boxed Daily Calendar
Popular calendar title! Witty comments throughouthundreds of snarky observationsfully adjustable easelcan sit on desktop or hang on wallEasy tear-off pagesSize is 6" x 5" The Daily Bitch calendar serves up a generous helping of attitude along with a side of sass every day of the year! Savor alone, or pass along to share all in good fun, of course! No sugary sweet aphorisms here.
Even the crabbiest curmudgeon will enjoy these cheeky declarations and snippy sayings.
365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar 2019
Puzzling headlines: man punches himself, charged with assaULT —headline, Gallup Independent New Mexico. Neighborhood watch cluelessness: I want to report either a fox or a werewolf standing on the corner. Actual call to 911 Popular calendar title! Celebrate a quarter century of stupidity! the 365 stUPIDEST THINGS EVER SAID is the perennially bestselling calendar for 25 years.
Here is a riotous round-up of politicians, athletes, entertainers, and others saying epically dumb things, collected by Ross and Kathryn Petras. Not-quite-there expressions: I’m the oldest I’ve ever been, right now. Mma fighter and UFC Champion Tim Sylvia. Every day, a new quote to make you laugh out loud and/or facepalm.
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The Argyle Sweater 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar
With more than 300 full-color cartoon panels not featured in previous calendars, The Argyle Sweater 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar will keep readers grinning, groaning, and laughing all year long. The argyle sweater presents a surreal, hilarious, and often punny look at the world you think you know. Popular calendar title!
As an added bonus, tips, quotes, lists, the back of each calendar page includes Daily Extra content such as puzzles, jokes, and trivia. With a penchant for the absurd, scott Hilburn explores what common expressions might literally mean, and imagines alternate realities for well-known retro and pop culture characters and historical events.
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Dog Shaming 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar
Popular calendar title! Everyone who has shared life with a dog can relate to the crazy antics and appreciate the adorable expressions that make it hard to stay mad at our furry friends for long. Think your dog deserves to be in the doghouse? You should see what other puppy parents have to deal with—stealing, running away, poor hygiene habits, and inappropriate and inconsiderate behavior.
The dog shaming 2019 day-to-day calendar features photos of some of the funniest cute-but-criminal canines submitted to the popular blog. Each full-color page of this calendar shows a contributed photo of the guilty pup with a sign describing his transgression.
Wild Words from Wild Women 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar
. I'm changing the things I cannot accept. Angela davis, a-list activist"i went home with this French guy ’cause he said something adorable like, 'I have an apartment. Amy schumer, audience slayer"The best things in life are free and the second best are very expensive. Gabrielle ""coco" Chanel, foremost fashionista Popular calendar title!
Fuel your fiery feminine side with the Wild Words from Wild Women 2019 Day-to-Day Calendar. Featuring quotes from some of the world's most noteworthy and notorious women on topics such as aging, and more, relationships, fashion, success, this calendar will make all wild women proud. I am no longer accepting the things I cannot change.
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